Allow me to introduce my partner Buster’s new favorite sex toy: Sir Richard’s Control Rim Joy. Soon after SheVibe sent us the Rim Joy in June, Buster started keeping it on their bedside table so it would always be in reach.

Then I started stealing it.

Although the Rim Joy’s marketed purpose is rimming, it’s functionally the same design as the now-defunct Fantasy for Her Fun Tongue. (After complaints – including mine – about the Fun Tongue dying, SheVibe removed it from their site.) That means you can direct its curved tongue anywhere: clitoris, nipples, frenulum, asshole…

And oh, I do.

(Or at least I do after I rinse all the lint off for the fifth time. As you can see from my review photos – which were taken immediately after a thorough wash – it collects lint like a motherfucker.)

sir richard’s rim joy design

The Control Rim Joy is 5 inches long (larger than my sizable palm), but it’s still relatively intuitive to hold. It has a plastic outer shell and lid that protects it from getting dusty between uses or being turned on accidentally. The rest of the toy is made of firm body-safe silicone.

The Rim Joy’s tongue is 1.5 inches long. It’s thicker at the base (as wide as a finger), and dips into a gently pointed tip. The Rim Joy’s licks are rigid, robotic sweeps, just like the more cumbersome Ultimate Pleasure. The tongue simultaneously vibrates for an added buzz of stimulation. (Unfortunately, this is not optional.)

You will notice a slightly shrill robotic whirring in the demo video below. Sadly, that unsubtle (and frankly grating) sound is non-negotiable. Pretty much every mechanized sex toy sounds the same or similarly jarring.

There are 2 ways to use the Rim Joy Oral Sex Simulator’s tongue: with and without the nozzle. The nozzle fits into a firm ring on the toy itself, and it’s super easy to pop it on and off. The silicone is thin, so the nozzle is flexible and comfortable when pressed against my body or enveloped by my outer labia or butt cheeks.

I prefer to use the Rim Joy without it because the nozzle just limits the tongue’s angle and reach. But it can be useful, especially if you have limited mobility and need help placing/steadying the tongue, or if you need a buffer to hold yourself open.

In addition to the licking function, the Rim Joy also has a button for self-warming. The toy’s heat is in the center of the tongue, and unfortunately doesn’t really spread any further. I wish it at least reached the tip, because it’s a pleasant addition. You can’t feel it at all with the nozzle on.

Like most modern sex toys, the Rim Joy is both rechargeable and waterproof. You don’t have to buy batteries, and you can use it in the bath. Being waterproof also makes it easier to clean, because you don’t have to be afraid of how much water you’re sloshing on it. Cleaning the Rim Joy is pretty straightforward, although there are numerous seams that need a swipe with a soft bristle brush or your fingernail to make sure you’ve gotten all the gunk.

what does the rim joy feel like?

If you expect the Rim Joy Vibrating Anal Rimmer’s tongue to be soft and yielding like an actual tongue, you’re going to be disappointed. The Rim Joy’s firm silicone tongue rubs more than licks in the traditional sense. Its steady, windshield wiper sweeps provide about the same pressure as a fingertip, but faster and with the added jolt of vibration.

I really fucking love this robot tongue. “The consistency of the motion is very pleasing to my clit. I can angle and direct the tongue wherever I want and know that the “licks” will stay on rhythm,” I wrote of the nearly identical Ultimate Pleasure. “The curved tip invites me to tease myself with more targeted attention. I can also turn the toy sideways and let the tongue’s broader side sweep back and forth. The latter is best for keeping continuous contact, and makes better use of the ever-present buzzy vibration in the tongue.”

The Control Rim Joy’s strokes feel stronger than the Ultimate Pleasure’s. You can press harder and it doesn’t strain or stall out. It’s also more direct/targeted than the Laguna Beach Lover’s long tongue. The Rim Joy is the most comfortable licking toy to hold by far, although I have to pull it away from my body to get to its button.

My main quibble with the Rim Joy is that it only has 2 steady licking speeds (fast and faster), and then a couple of indistinguishable patterns. That’s not enough range! Another slower speed would make it less intimidating to start. I’d also like the option to turn the vibration on and off, since I’m not a fan of super buzzy/bitey vibes.

Like any friction-based sex toy, the Sir Richard Rim Joy’s tongue is best enjoyed when you’re already aroused. If for example you’re using it on a clitoris, the robotic wagging feels less punchy when you’re turned on, because the clitoris hardens – just like a penis does. If I don’t have time to peruse some porn, I’ll grab a regular vibrator or a pump to warm up.

rimming with the sir richard’s rim joy

The toy’s namesake sensation… unf. Slather some water-based lube on this thing and it’ll lick firmly and persistently, zinging with buzzy vibration. It’s so fucking good.

Buster and I are both fat, so our reach is limited. The easiest position for us to use the Rim Joy for its intended purpose – at least when a partner isn’t available to hold it for you – is laying slightly twisted on your hip and back. You can then reach around your other leg to hold the toy against your ass.

This position is doubly effective because it leaves your genitals open to other kinds of play. Going down on Buster or fucking them with a Big Daddy dildo while the toy rims them? Yes, please!

The nozzle is a must to get to your asshole, unless you have another free hand or you’re in a position that naturally spreads your ass. (Depending on your booty, that might be on your back with your knees to your chest, or on your knees with your ass up.)

Once in place, the Rim Joy’s mechanized wagging drags over my butt hole like a prodding fingertip, or a tongue tip firmed up for penetration. You can fuck your hole with the Rim Joy (the pucky little motor will keep the tongue going), but for me at least it’s mostly a weird but welcome tease.

When my ass is being eaten, I usually prefer for my partner to use the widest part of their relaxed tongue. That’s not something this toy can do. For the Rim Joy to appeal to your asshole, you’ll need to prefer (or at least enjoy) firmer, pointed licks.

final thoughts on the control rim joy

Buster and I really love this toy. Robotic tongues are my favorite kind of “oral sex simulator,” and the Control Rim Joy does it well. It’s comfortable to hold (and can even be held between my fat thighs for hands-free use) and easy to use. There’s no learning curve. You turn it on, hold it against your junk, and let it lick you.

Could it be more nuanced, with more settings, a better warming function, and potentially different tongue size/firmness options? Yes. Could it have less seams so it was easier to clean? Yes. But at about $60 USD (half the price of the similar albeit more suped up Ultimate Pleasure), I’m fine with this as a version 1.

Now keep tweaking with this design, because the people (me) want more physically interactive sex toy options.

You can grab a Control Rim Joy Vibrating Anal Rimmer of your own from SheVibe, and some water-based lube to go with it.

Thank you, SheVibe, for sending me the Sir Richard’s Control Rim Joy in exchange for an honest review.

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