This past week, I celebrated my blog’s third anniversary by drinking some Jack Daniel’s Tennessee Apple and crying because I’m so behind on my review queue.

Don’t get me wrong, this blog is the second best thing to ever happen to me. (The first best thing is the subject of this interview.) But sex toy reviewing is a complicated job. It’s not a free sex toy conveyer belt. Anyone can start a sex blog, but not everyone can keep one going.

I would not be able to maintain this blog – or review these toys – without help. Today I wanted to take some time to introduce my partner, co-tester, and faux personal assistant: Buster LeBeau.

Hi there, long time fan. Can you introduce yourself to the folks that don’t get to listen to you snore all the time?

I only snore when I’m asleep or exponentially bored.

Anyway, I’m Buster Lebeau, aka Tired Daddy. I’m Betty’s spouse, personal assistant (lol), sex toy co-tester, and patient but exhausted subby daddy. As far as “what I do for a living,” I have a miserable desk job that is now completely remote (work from home.)

I am a non-binary, pansexual mess who leans into hot goth girlfriend or lazy skater/rocker boyfriend aesthetics. I grew up in Mississippi of all places, and can vouch that the best thing I got out of that state was the ability to cook comfort food.

In my free time I game and hang out with our grouchy elderly pug. Pre-pandemic I spent a lot of time on the weekends at theme parks (Hollywood Studios, Animal Kingdom, and Universal Studios were my top three.) My other interests include, but are not limited to Star Wars (especially Clone Wars), kink, video games, horror, and comics.

What’s it like, testing sex toys and helping me with the multitude of tasks that blogging requires?

It feels like having a very specific series of part-time second jobs. If I’m not helping directly with testing a toy, then I’m helping with doing the photoshoot for a toy, or I’m out shopping for props for a photoshoot.

I feel like the super supportive personal assistant daddy. I’m either gonna mount the toy and give feedback, or go fetch you a hot chocolate and a new color of wrapping paper for a backdrop.

I’m also great at fetching lost packages. Most instances, I only deal with phone calls with the USPS with long hold times, which end up with me having to drive to a far-off post office. But I’ve had to drive to neighbors’ houses.

One time the post office had mistakenly given a far-off neighbor our parcel locker key, so they got our box of sex toys while we got their Chewy order of what I’m assuming was dog food and not several hundred dollars worth of vibrators. It was pretty hilarious because when I pulled up I could hear the person’s three Yorkies from the driveway. I had to trade their kibble for our package. I about died when the person said “oh, yeah I thought our box looked different.” Thankfully, they hadn’t opened it yet.

That also happened with a neighbor who had several kids under the age of 10. I barely got the box before they had opened it.

How do you approach sex toy testing, as someone who gives notes but ultimately isn’t responsible for writing the review?

I try to make mental notes throughout the whole process of things I would want to know if I were someone trying research the toy before I bought it. That’s kind of the most important thing to me when I read other people’s reviews, so I want to make sure I give as much specifics as I can.

I’m kind of wordy with the notes I give, so I’m almost giving my own half-assed version of a review in those. I say half-assed because a lot of the time the testing part can be very distracting because, you know, the whole getting railed by a big dildo and being overwhelmed thing. So, I have the info, but not the finesse that you have, to make my brain soup into something comprehensive and fun to read. (Editor Note: This is blatant nonsense.)

What have been your favorite toys to test? What have been the worst?

In no particular order, some of my favorites have been: Uberrime’s Aqua King, Lust Art’s Frank’s Monster Dildo, Geeky Sex Toys’ Dix the Destroyer Dildo, and Talisman Leather’s Ardor Strap-On Harness.

The Ardor Harness was such a neat item to test. Like it wasn’t just the fact it was such a high quality item, it was also such a game changer for sex. I remember helping you with getting it on, and it was such an intimate experience with threading the straps through and securing them with the buckles. I’m a sucker for the smell of real leather. To be on my knees and getting to strap you up was a really nice experience, not just because I knew what it was going to mean for us, but also as a sub. I have a lot of feelings about that, that I don’t wanna try to cram it all into this answer lol.

I will say it was also comical because we used the Aqua King in that harness. I am definitely size royalty. And like I said before, that was one of my favorite dildos to test and in a harness it is so much more intense. The head shape on that dildo fucking pops over my g-spot when it’s being thrust and that is fucking phenomenal when in a harness. It’s intense in the best of ways if you like toys that size.

The worst: Uberrime’s Amo (I wanted to like this one SO much because it’s SO pretty, but it HATES my pubic bone), Nu Sensuelle Trinitii (it sucks too hard), and Cal Exotics’ Eclipse Thrusting Rotator Probe (it pinches.) The Eclipse really caught me off guard because it feels good vaginally, like the pinching aspects of it are more subtle or something, but when we switched to assplay with it HOLY FUCK did that hurt. I thought we were friends, Eclipse, what the hell?

In addition to testing toys together, you’ve taken a lot of the photos for my reviews. What are some interesting moments you’ve had, setting up and taking pics?

The ones I’m most proud of are probably because they were so interesting to set up. I set up the photoshoot for the Uberrime Splendid in our RV freezer, with blue lights and tacked up fake icicles to help the whole “ice cavern, Snowmeyser” theme.

For the Dix the Destroyer shoot I set everything up beneath the dashboard of the RV, partially in the engine. I had orange halloween lights, cassette tapes I made custom labels for (that were actually the titles of other Geeky Sex Toys), and mini M&Ms scattered around (because baby Groot reference.)

I also did all the video shots for the Uberrime Calaveras review in the bathtub with a broken apart diffuser for eerie lighting, a mini fog mister meant for an aquarium, and a soaking wet bed sheet. I gave the toy lift by setting it up on part of a rice cooker I had hidden under the sheet. Movie magic!

Be honest: what’s the most pissed off you’ve ever been at my job?

The worst has got to be where there was a period of online harassment on Twitter. A sex toy retailer made a tweet spotlighting a shitty transphobic author they didn’t research first, and you pointed it out. The retailer removed the tweet, but all fucking hell broke loose from the transphobe’s followers. Hundreds of messages.

I couldn’t say anything. There’s really no point in trying to call people out like that when they’ve drank that much of the bigot kool-aid. It still baffles me that people that ignorant and hateful exist and do so so boldly on the internet. Being trans, queer, and fat, it’s bullshit you have to deal with all the time depending on your circumstances. It’s one thing to deal with it yourself, versus watching it be the most important person in your life… I really, really had to fight the urge to tweet back at people and go off.

Luckily, it only lasted a few weeks, and you handled it perfectly. You already had experience in that from comic book Twitter back in the day. But man, the whole thing made my fucking blood boil.

Other than that, it’s really only ever getting frustrated with toys that end up hurting one of us because it either doesn’t work for our bodies or it wasn’t constructed well, like that damned rotating plug.

What are some toys you’d like us to review in the future?

In no particular order, my review wishlist is: Kinklab Neon Wand Electrosex Kit, Uberrime Cephalatrox and Cthulhu dildos, Clone-A-Pussy Labia Casting Kit, Shilo Pack and Play Silicone Dildo, some Liberator Sex Furniture, Crystal Delight Pony Tail Plug, Tantus A Bomb Plug, Tantus Bido Palm Flogger, and the Doc Johnson Kink Power Banger Fucking Machine. (Most of these will probably come out of pocket lol.)

There’s a lot of monster dildos I also want to get my hands on, specifically an ovipositor. I’m totally getting one in the new year because the friggin photos I could take for one of those… omg.

Tentacles and monster dildos are some of my favorite sex toys, and an ovipositor is just inherently erotic to me on seven different levels. It could be from all the monster hentai I pirated back in the days of Napster and Morpheus and Limewire (showing my age here.) But monster hentai was some of the first experiences with sex and porn and eroticism I had growing up.

Also, the Inclusion Rainbow Thigh Harness you showed me. I really enjoy the cowgirl and reverse cowgirl position, but it isn’t easy when you’re two larger people. The harness is so cute, and I feel like it would do wonders for being able to ride you without hurting our hips.

And you and I have been talking about getting some Twisted Monk rope since we started watching Watts the Safeword years ago. We just haven’t gotten the chance to put the money into it. Rope Bondage is something I want to seriously start to explore, and they have some of the nicest quality rope I’ve seen, and so many gorgeous colors to choose from. It would be really great to learn some simple ties this year for sure.

Who are some of your other favorite sex bloggers?

Queer Earthling, Mx Nillin, Backwoods Bedroom, Kelvin Sparks, Girly Juice, and Bex Talks Sex.

You can (and should) follow Buster on Twitter and Instagram.

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