What makes a harness great?

If you ask five people, you’ll probably get five slightly different answers. If you ask me, a great harness is comfortable to wear, doesn’t need constant readjusting, and was designed to fit for optimal dildo control. (Being aesthetically sexy doesn’t hurt either.)

When Talisman Leather reached out to me last year, they let me pick which of their three harness designs to review: the thricely-ringed Gallo Harness, the triangular-fronted Margeaux, and the Ardor. I chose the Ardor Harness for its wider back strap and large front panel, the latter of which carries the harness’s single o-ring higher on the body than most strap-ons do.

It was the latter detail that I was especially interested in. My partner and I are both fat, and the higher o-ring placement seemed ideal for contending with thick thighs in close proximity.

My instincts turned out to be right… as did my hope that the Ardor Harness would be great.

about the talisman leather ardor harness

There are a number of harness styles out there, but the Ardor is the classic two strap (or jock strap.) These are named for the presence of two independent leg straps that go between the thighs. The wearer’s body is mostly uncovered, providing easy access to the genitals for those interested in giving and receiving. And because the Ardor places your dildo higher on the body, some people with penises may be able to wear it as well.

The Ardor Harness is made of real, beautiful leather; Talisman offers a number of colors and textures, but I chose the “Black” orientation featured in the listing. Other options include (but aren’t limited to) purple, walnut, brandy bullhide, smooth oxblood, and saddle. The leather of my harness is incredibly soft with an even softer underside. Its pliancy makes it conform to my body like a well-worn glove.

The Ardor’s construction is very sturdy and practical, which contributes to its overall no-fuss, androgynous appearance. The harness is held together by silver rivets and buckles, but antique brass hardware is available as an alternative.

The o-ring is secured to the front panel by four snaps. The snaps require strong-ish fingers to fasten. My harness came with a 2-inch metal ring. It can be used with most dildos with 2 inch diameters and under, as long as their base is bigger than the ring. If the rigidity of a metal o-ring isn’t your style, substitute silicone rings are pretty inexpensive.

There are four fastenings on the Ardor Harness besides the o-ring: a buckle on both leg straps, and a larger buckle at both ends of the (removable) strap across your back. These buckles are all conveniently located near your hips for easier fastening and adjustment.

getting the ardor harness on

Usually when putting on a jock strap style harness, you step into the leg straps, pull the whole thing up, and adjust. But the Ardor’s design gives you room for improvisation. The back strap is removable, and the thigh straps – which fasten in the front – are only permanently attached at one end. This gives you four fastening points you can undo in your quest to gear up.

My preferred way of putting the Ardor Strap-On Harness on is to unbuckle everything and hold the front panel in place with the leg straps dangling loose. My partner – ever the dutiful squire – can reattach the back strap for me, then help loop the thigh straps around my legs to buckle them at my hips. I’m very vertigo-prone, so this is fantastic for me! And I imagine this design will be of particular interest to harness wearers with limited mobility.

my experience using the ardor harness

Talisman Leather reached out to me in part because they wanted someone with a larger body to evaluate the fit of their harness. My body size fluctuates, but generally my waist is 52-60 inches, and my thighs are 30 inches. I carry a lot of fat in my hips and lower belly. This can complicate the fit and functionality of harnesses designed for less shapely bodies.

To my continued delight, the Ardor Harness fits wonderfully!

The incredibly soft leather conforms to my curves and lumps, hugging me securely but not restricting my ability to move as needed. Unlike backpack-style nylon straps, the supple leather of the Ardor Harness doesn’t chafe or dig into flesh. (And because it’s soft, it doesn’t squeak or groan when I move.) I’ve read that leather harnesses can stretch in use, but if the Ardor does this, it’s never enough to warrant notice or major adjustment.

All of the straps are fastened by center bar buckles, a choice I’m grateful for because they don’t loosen during use like ladder buckles do. (Seriously, ladder buckles suck and I see them on so many harnesses!) The buckles don’t rest against your skin, either, so you generally don’t have to worry about chafing or indents.

I like rough sex and tend to change positions frequently, and the Ardor Harness lets me do that painlessly and unencumbered. I didn’t even know that was something a harness could do… at least not for me.

ardor harness fit during use

Depending on my position, the thin leg straps dangle on my thighs even when I’ve tightened them. I’ve found I don’t need them to be form-fitting in order to be functional. Everything stays in place, and they don’t dig or scuff. Most of the harness’s stability comes from the waist/hip anyway. Even when I’m using big dildos like the Aqua King, the front panel doesn’t shift or contort completely out of place. Probably because the straps are rivet-bound just beneath the o-ring’s fastenings as counterbalance.

And as I’m sure my fellow fat folks are curious: the top of the front panel does ‘gape’ a bit in use because it rests on the very bottom of my stomach. (This will, of course, vary depending on your body shape and where you situate the harness.) But while I initially worried it would make the harness less sturdy or feel unsexy, I honestly don’t notice or care. Wearing the Ardor Harness is so comfortable that I genuinely forget I’m wearing it. It just melts away, its presence a sleek second skin that requires no more attention than my own.

the ardor harness and dildos

With how I wear and adjust it, the Ardor holds dildos at the top of my mons pubis (or pubic mound) just beneath my belly. I have pretty ample thighs; perching my dildo above them as opposed to between them means they don’t get in my way. I also have better control of the dildo from this angle. It sits on top of my pubic mound rather than dangling from it in a futile bid to create clitoral friction/pressure. Higher o-rings just work best for my body.

The Ardor’s front panel isn’t padded, but I haven’t experienced any kind of discomfort or bruising. This might be another advantage to having a plush bod, or this might be because I generally use softer density dildos.

My single biggest (and, honestly only) complaint about the Ardor Harness is the placement of the o-ring straps. The 2 inch o-ring can accommodate most of my larger toys, but the straps don’t leave room for their flared bases. Fat dildos with smaller bases (like the They/Them) do alright, but dildos with thicker or more rigid bases won’t fit. This definitely limits your options.

Dildos in my collection that fit eerily perfectly include the Avant D2 Purple Rain (1.5-inch diameter), the Avant Pride P3 Beauty (1.25-inch diameter), the Uberrime Splendid Small (1.6-inch), and the Uberrime Night King (1.7-inch.) Ones that don’t technically fit but can be convinced via brute force include the Uberrime Aqua-King (2-inch diameter), Vixskin Mustang (1.5 inch), and Neo Elite 6 (1.4 inch.)

harness care and cleaning

Because I sometimes undo the o-ring straps with lubey fingers, they’re usually the only part of the harness that needs cleaning. Baby wipes or car leather wipes that aren’t too damp, and are unscented and alcohol-free, are good for post-use tidying when necessary.

For more thorough cleaning, you’ll want to use saddle soap. Wipe your harness down, then either apply the saddle soap on a wipe or work it into a light lather with a very small amount of water. It doesn’t need to be “rinsed,” but instead thoroughly wiped clean. (You never want to soak a leather harness with water or leave soap residue on it.) Let it dry unfurled somewhere before storing it.

I’ve been told by friends that leather harnesses should be stored laying flat, or resting over a cloth-wrapped coat hanger (because metal can sometimes leave smells on leather.) Don’t put it in a plastic storage container, especially in humid climates where moisture can collect; your harness can get mildewy or take on the smell of the plastic.

I use mine regularly enough that I’m not worried about it getting stiff with disuse on a hanger. If you’re storing it for long periods, make sure to occasionally condition it with a leather conditioner that’s animal fat free. Let it dry before returning it to the closet.

ordering from talisman leather

Talisman Leather sells its pieces through Etsy; its harnesses are sorted into a Harnesses & Lingerie category, which also features restraints, floggers, and collars. When ordering a harness, you’ll be prompted to select your desired leather color/texture. Sizing and any other modifications will have to be discussed via Etsy’s notes system.

When Talisman reached out to me, they needed three measurements for the Ardor: around my body just above my hips (in my case 58 inches); diagonally from the center of my mons pubis / pubic mound to the outside of my hip (16 inches); and the length around my thigh where it meets the groin (32 inches.) These were specific to the Ardor, which sits higher and has a more prominent from panel than other harnesses from Talisman Leather. I took the measurements with a cheap fabric measuring tape from a grocery store sewing/craft section.

Because each piece is made by hand, it can take a few weeks to receive your order. However, rush ordering is available, and Talisman’s recent Etsy reviews include several folks who got their rush orders within their desired timeframe.

final thoughts on the ardor harness 

I’ve already written a piece about how helpful the Ardor Harness has been for my dysphoria, because it’s so dependable, unobtrusive, and sexy. So I’ll set that line of thought aside for this review.

Who might love this harness as much as I do? People who…

• like supple, fragrant leather
• have a penis and want a harness that will rest just above their penis
• don’t need/want clitoral friction, vibrator pockets, or skin contact with the base of their dildo
• need a front-fastening harness
• are tired of shitty ladder buckles that result in loose straps
• are tired of abrasive backpack-style straps that rub and gouge skin
• are fat and want a harness made for their specific measurements
• want a sturdy, androgynous aesthetic and dependable construction
• don’t need bumper padding
• want to support a two person team of creative, skilled, and dedicated artisans who intentionally craft their pieces to be life-long investments

The Ardor Harness probably won’t be your first harness if you’re on a budget. But it’s absolutely worthy of being the harness you save back for after your first one falls apart… I speak from experience.

You can check out the Ardor Strap-On Harness on Etsy, currently for $135 USD.

 

---

Thank you, Talisman Leather, for sending me the Ardor Harness in exchange for an honest review. Affiliate links were not used for Talisman Leather, but were used for other products mentioned in this review.