(Note: Please read this entire review before you decide to buy! There is a lot to love about this wand, but some parts of it really stink.)

The first time I ever saw a wand vibrator was on (the now defunct) Wired Pussy, one of Kink.com’s many specialty porn sites. This was back when the Magic Wand was only available in corded form, so its inclusion on screen often featured performers pausing to flick the wire out of the way of their imposing high heels. The sound of the cord hitting the floor – usually in a dank, warehouse-like corner of the Armory – is as clear in my mind now as it was in my headphones a decade ago; and like many things from Kink, it’s now part of my sexual framework. You can still catch me getting flush-faced from the noise association when my partner fights with the vacuum cord.

So when I saw that SheVibe carried the Kink Power Wand 16-Function Silicone Massager, a wand made in collaboration between Kink and Doc Johnson, I knew I had to request it for review. Like the Stinger Electro-Play Wand (review here), the Power Wand seduced me with nostalgia – and aesthetic. Many folks might consider the black/red combo played out, but I’ll take it over pink on any day ending in y. I’ve never seen a wand look so decadent and wicked, and my masculine inclinations perked up immediately when admiring its flat black body and sleek red trim – it’s not inherently masculine, but it soothes the dysphoria-prickled part of my psyche that often craves dark colors.

And – like the wands wielded by those cruel, sauntering femmes – it has a cord.

taking charge of your sex life

I love rechargeable vibrators. I love not being tethered to an outlet or needing to steal batteries from other devices to keep my vibrator juiced. But I’m autistic, and executive dysfunction and brain fog means I’m not always diligent about keeping our toys charged. It’s not unusual for me to sabotage myself by forgetting to plug things in between sessions.

I also share toys with my partner during sex. A mere hour and a half (usually less) is pretty standard run time for most mid-to-luxury rechargeable toys, and that’s not long enough for both of us to comfortably achieve orgasm when taking turns. So while I appreciate the convenience of going cordless over contending with a long, unwieldy wire and the absolutely absurd outlet placements in my house… I also like just being able to plug the Kink Power Wand in and get to business, without worrying that my vibrator of choice is going to die.

The Kink Power Wand also comes with a universal outlet adapter (and surge protector), which means just about anyone can make use of it.

could the kink power wand be better?

I wish the wand offered both on and off the cord use, like with the Kink Power Wand’s rechargeable competitor and predecessor, the Magic Wand Rechargeable. The KPW is a similar price point to the MWR (the KPW is currently $110 USD; the MWR is $125 USD), so I think it’s fair to be disappointed in the lack of comparative versatility. Though MWR is cordless, its charge cord can be plugged in while the wand is still in use – saving you from getting edged by your toy if you run out of juice. If only Doc Johnson had managed to imitate the MWR’s flexible functionality.

But power source wasn’t the only Magic Wand Rechargeable comparison I was interested in when asking for the Kink Power Wand. I had also heard that its RPM’s are significantly higher, meaning the vibrations should be stronger. If the KPW needs the cord for muscle (since there’s only so much juice you can get off a battery), then its reliance on outlet power is more than called for.

The question is, is the KPW legitimately stronger than the MWR?

kink power wand vs the magic wand rechargeable

Wands are generally powerhouse sex toys, and the Kink Power Wand is no exception. Wands provide stimulation more broadly than traditional vibrators, meaning that when their vibrations are on the rumble end of the motor spectrum, they can more effectively reach the internal parts of the clitoris. The Kink Power Wand exemplifies this, too.

The KPW has a total of sixteen (fifteen) settings: eight steady speeds (except it’s actually just seven), and eight patterns. The number of speeds is of particular satisfaction for me, as it means a smoother journey to the top – and a higher likelihood that fans of low and mid-tier wand strengths will find a setting that’s right for them.

The first steady speed starts off pretty mild – perhaps even “weak” – for a wand this size, but its penetrating rumbles are definitely noticeable. It’s gentler than the Magic Wand Rechargeable’s first setting, and is a nice warm up over immediately plunging into bone-deep intensity. The second setting is stronger than the MWR’s first, but is noticeably more rumbly.

As is customary with strong vibrations, some surface buzz comes in on the third setting (stronger than the MWR’s second) and gets buzzier from there. But throughout its settings, the KPW remains rumblier than the MWR – and stronger, too. The fifth setting is a strength match for the MWR’s fourth and final setting, and the next two creep a bit higher.

There is no eighth steady speed, despite the packaging’s claims. Pretty sure they fudged it for visual balance’s sake.

So, yes: the Kink Power Wand is stronger then the Magic Wand Rechargeable. And it’s rumblier – its vibrations massaging deeper and more effectively than the MWR. But it’s not such a big jump in power that I’d recommend immediately smashing your piggy bank – if you already have a wand you’re mostly happy with, you’re not missing out on anything major. But if you’re in the market for your first wand or you’ve got the cash to blow, the KPW’s seven level pacing and patterns make it an appealing choice.

i actually love the patterns, holy shit

There’s not anything inherently appealing about the Kink Power Wand’s patterns. There’s blips, there’s ramp-ups, there’s shuttering waves. But if there’s a target audience to be pleased by patterns, I’m certainly not it; I usually find vibrator patterns to be worthless beyond an initial cursory scroll-through. Patterns usually sacrifice power for performance, so you get ~fancy~ but unsatisfying patterings of vibration.

But the Kink Power Wand does something genuinely interesting with its patterns: it allows you to increase their strength. Each of its eight patterns can be brought up to top speed, at which point even my pattern-hating-junk is interested. And not just interested – maybe a little bit in love. (Okay, a lot in love.)

Since the KPW doesn’t make me compromise vibration strength, I’m able to actually enjoy the thumps and arcs and the way they roil against me. Better yet, most of the KPW’s patterns don’t have breaks in them. (Some are so steady that the first few times I clicked through them, I thought they might not be patterns at all.) Strong, continuous, varied vibrations that rumble down into my pubic bone? Yes. Yes, please, thank you.

wow this thing is quiet

Another point in the Kink Power Wand’s favor is that it’s quieter than the Magic Wand Rechargeable (whose noise level made us uncomfortable at our last place, because of thin walls and proximity to our neighbors.) It’s all whirring purrs until you switch it over to patterns and then ramp up the speed – only then does it match the MWR’s mechanical juttering. On its highest steady speed, my fan and a blanket muffle it just fine.

but does it give good head?

There is another, unexpected difference between the Kink Power Wand and others that I’ve tried: the soft, removable head. It’s made of a thin slip of silicone fitted over squishy white foam padding, and it’s loosely caped on a metal nub at the end of the wand. This allows users to pop it off for easier cleaning, or swap it out with other heads from Doc Johnson’s Kink Wand line.

The softer head is a source of debate between Buster and I. Buster enjoys its plush, yielding bulk; they love to cram vibrators firmly against their body, and the Kink Power Wand doesn’t leave them unpleasantly sore like others have. And on the lower settings, it seem to distribute the vibrations more effectively despite being smaller than the MWR’s head. But I find that it makes the Kink Power Wand feel flimsy and cheap.

And I worry about hygiene. What happens if fluids or moisture get on the padding? If the padding becomes gross or damaged in the future, I’ll have to hand over $30 USD to replace the head with another from the line.

The head just doesn’t seem like it’s worthy of a $110 sex toy. It feels like a creepy knockoff toy bought from a shady stall at a flea market. (And, horrifyingly, it reeks like one too – but we’ll get to that later.) Which is unfortunate, because the rest of the wand looks and feels quite luxurious.

beauty and the buttons

A common complaint about the Magic Wand (both original and Rechargeable) is that its appearance hasn’t changed from its humble muscle massager beginnings. It looks like a medical device, and not the deviously sexy kind. (Though your mileage may vary on that.)

Being frequently featured in ethical porn and on feminist crafts and merch, the toy colloquially (and formerly) known as the Hitchai has become a symbol of sexual empowerment and pleasure… but when it’s not clutched in the fist of a sex positive babe, it’s kinda meh. It’s the R2D2 of sex toys: a spunky badass that’s always DTF, but his inoffensively nonsexual design means you’re only into him in very specific contexts.

Or maybe that’s just me! Moving on.

In comparison, the Kink Power Wand is a sleek, sensual tool that prioritizes aesthetics as an integral part of the sex toy experience. Its handle is attractively tapered and its surface is almost butter-smooth, and it’s noticeably lighter than other wands of its size that I’ve held. The sparkling red plastic trim gives it a visual edge that I wish had been echoed in the buttons. Wouldn’t they look so much nicer in the same handsome red? Maybe with a bit more definition to their indented markings, too, seeing as I can never click the right button in the dark…

But button finickiness is the least of this wand’s problems.

the smell, oh god, the horrible smell

When I first opened my Kink Power Wand, I was hit in the face with the pungent stink of burning tires. It was so strong that I was immediately, unshakably convinced that Doc Johnson was full of shit, and the head of the wand wasn’t silicone as advertised. When I touched the head, the material didn’t feel like silicone either. It smelled and felt like toxic toys I’ve owned in the past.

Trying to diffuse the smell, I detached the head and left it out in the open air on my kitchen table for a few weeks (yes, weeks), hoping it was just factory stench and would fade with time. When this didn’t work, I tried boiling it – which is usually enough to rid the occasional waft of butt smell from dildos after using them anally. No change.

I sent two emails to Doc Johnson to complain about the smell and ask what the wand head was actually made of. The first email I erroneously sent to the Doc Johnson shop, who politely directed me to reach out to the actual manufacturer; and the second – sent to the correct address – received a placating reply apologizing that I was “dissatisfied with the product” and insisting it was silicone.

So I lit it on fire!

is this shit actually silicone?

The Flame Test – best summarized in Lilly’s Deciphering the Flame Test – is the act of introducing a flame to the surface of a toy described as silicone to determine if it’s actually silicone. I should have done it the very first day I had the wand in my possession, but life is rough and spoons are few, so I put it off until the mystery finally drove me out of a week-long depression nap with a lighter in hand.

To my surprise, the Kink Power Wand’s stinky stinky head produced white-gray ash, just as described in Lilly’s post. Definitely silicone and thus body safe. It just smells terrible and has a slightly weird texture due to its thinness.

At least I’m able to safely use it!

keeping your kink power wand clean (and less smelly)

Unfortunately, if there is a trick to de-stinking your flimsy wand head, I haven’t found it yet.

I tried both scrubbing and soaking it in a 10% bleach solution, but neither method seemed to have an immediate impact on the stink.The tire scent has, however, now faded with time – I suspect from a combination of boiling, bleach-tinged washing, and leaving it out on shelves and countertops – and can only be smelled if you have the wand near your face. Or you touch it for too long and then smell your fingers.

Sigh.

For regular cleaning, warm water and a mild soap will do. (I remove the head to wash it and let it dry inside out before putting the padding back in and returning it to the wand.) The flexible, slated neck beneath the head and the plastic trimming need extra care – if using your fingernails squicks you out, a few swipes with a soft-bristled bottle brush every so often should do it. Just take care not to fully douse the wand in water, because it’s not water proof and you’ll risk drenching the padding inside the head.

and in melancholy conclusion, 

As I finish this review, the clock is counting down to the end of 2018. Beside my laptop sits a powerful, rumbly, attractive wand – second glance and I remember it’s an expensive sex toy with a cord and stinky head. I’ve spent the last year evaluating sex toys and writing about my experiences so people can make educated decisions about where and how to spend their money, and I don’t feel like I know what to say here.

I am fully confident in recommending SheVibe as a where. Their inventory is huge and well-organized, their site is both unique and a pleasure to browse, their customer service is stellar, and their staff are some of the best people in this industry.

I’m not so confident about the how. Because I’m not sure if I can recommend a toy that smells like a burned tire for the first three months of ownership (and perhaps longer if not for diligent cleaning and airing out) even if it has deep, rumbly vibrations and toe-curlingly strong patterns – and it’s hotter than R2D2.

I love this wand. I shiver when I hear its cord hit the nearest surface and drag. I’m never worried that I won’t orgasm under the onslaught of its powerful vibrations; it’s as sure as a hand on my throat. I love using it when I top, winding its cord in my free hand as I cram the yielding head against against my partner. It has replaced the Magic Wand Rechargeable – the most expensive sex toy we own – as our go-to wand.

But if I’d gotten a whiff of it, I’d probably never have asked the sex shop superheroes behind SheVibe to send me one for review.

You can find the Kink Power Wand 16-Function Silicone Body Massager at SheVibe for (currently) $110 USD. SheVibe has a huge and diverse inventory of wands, which can be perused here.

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Thank you, SheVibe, for sending me the Kink Power Wand in exchange for an honest review. Affiliate links were used in this post.