{"id":2603,"date":"2019-10-12T15:37:51","date_gmt":"2019-10-12T15:37:51","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bettybutch.com\/?p=2603"},"modified":"2020-07-06T17:51:12","modified_gmt":"2020-07-06T17:51:12","slug":"using-sex-toys-is-nothing-to-be-ashamed-of","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bettybutch.com\/index.php\/2019\/10\/12\/using-sex-toys-is-nothing-to-be-ashamed-of\/","title":{"rendered":"Using sex toys is nothing to be ashamed of."},"content":{"rendered":"
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[Description: An assortment of sex toys. From left-top to bottom: Maia 420 Bullet<\/a>, Satisfyer Fluttering Flower<\/a>, Blush Wellness G Curve<\/a>, Cobra Penis Vibe<\/a>, Heart Wedge<\/a>, Man Wand<\/a>, Satisfyer Traveler<\/a>, Magic Wand<\/a>, Lovehoney Happy Rabbit<\/a>, Rose Massager Set<\/a>, Tantus Intermediate Strap-On Kit<\/a>, Avant D2 Dildo<\/a>.]<\/figcaption><\/figure>There is a lot of negative stigma surrounding sex toys. I\u2019ve heard people say that they\u2019re frivolous, or they\u2019re only for lonely perverts, or that they\u2019re a crutch for people who don\u2019t know how to pleasure their partner(s) \u201cright.\u201d Since my blog is about 90% sex toys, I think it\u2019s obvious that I don\u2019t believe these shitty stereotypes \u2013 but still, these narratives are pervasive, so I wanted to talk about it.<\/p>\n

There\u2019s nothing shameful, selfish, or sad about using sex toys. They\u2019re a fun, inventive addition to sex and masturbation.<\/p>\n

Can some of them be pricey? Yes. But there are plenty of quality, budget-friendly toys<\/a> \u2013 and besides, pleasure is an important aspect of wellness and self-esteem. It\u2019s worth investing in<\/em>. If I can drop $70 on another Joy-Con for my Switch so I can play with friends, I can spend the same on a body-safe sex toy<\/a> or two that\u2019s just as great for local co-op. (Or I can snag an app controlled toy<\/a> for long distance play!)<\/p>\n

Can sex toys be useful for single and\/or sex starved folks? Sure! They can provide new sensations to shake up self-pleasure routines. Being single isn\u2019t a bad thing, and neither is masturbation. The fact that we shame people for it is indicative of how self-conscious we as a society are about independence. Also, sex toys are purchased by folks in relationships too, and some of the most popular sex toys are specifically designed<\/em> for coupled sex<\/a>.<\/p>\n

The last myth \u2013 that sex toys are for people that aren\u2019t good at sex \u2013 irritates me the most. Pleasure is not a competition. It\u2019s not a graded experience. Everyone\u2019s body and sexual needs and preferences<\/a> are profoundly different. Some people can\u2019t get off on all the tips and tricks you get from magazine listicles. And that\u2019s okay! Deciding to introduce sex toys into one\u2019s sex life shows that you recognize that toys can provide new sensations and experiences. Sex toys are tools! They\u2019re usually only as useful as creativity and craftiness allows.<\/p>\n

(But also? Deciding not to use sex toys is totally valid too. Don\u2019t let the sometimes overbearing marketing make you think you\u2019re having substandard sex if you\u2019re not buying the latest pricey doohickey. You do you.)<\/p>\n

All that being said, some of us actually do need<\/em> sex toys. Whether it\u2019s due to stimulation needs, disability<\/a>, or the dozens of other reasons, sex toys are sometimes more than tools; sometimes, they\u2019re necessary components to pleasure. We\u2019re often the ones hurt the most by the stigma surrounding sex toy use. When these negative stereotypes are parroted, they shame people out of pursuing what\u2019s might be the best option for them. We\u2019re made to feel broken, greedy, or self-indulgent.<\/p>\n

But everyone and every body deserves to feel pleasure, including pleasure that\u2019s derived from modern invention.<\/p>\n

So maybe let\u2019s stop sneering at sex toy use<\/a>?<\/p>\n

\n

This post wasn\u2019t sponsored, but all links go to my affiliate Peepshow Toys<\/a>! You can get 10% off your purchase by using my exclusive discount code at checkout: betty<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

There is a lot of negative stigma surrounding sex toys. I’ve heard people say that they’re frivolous, or they’re only for lonely perverts, or that they’re a crutch for people who don’t know how to pleasure their partner(s) “right.” Since my blog is about 90% […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2604,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[859,721,724,16],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2603","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-sex-toy-deep-dives","category-sex-toys","category-essays-articles","category-essays-guides"],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t